In a world of perfect imperfection I pray you embrace the beauty in the world and in your life. I pray you find joy in your every day even at the lowest points. I pray you feel the love and the support of God in your life. I pray you learn your divinity. God is always with us one must have faith.
I want to share a peace of me. I once read it takes something to completely destroy you for you to be able to get a big reward in life... something along those lines. This didnt seem to me like the reality of life. In that moment I didnt under, over, stand reality of life. I was living in a fantasy, a bubble of my insecurities, my ego, my creativity, my pain, and the one that kept me through it all, my senses.
I met a guy when I was 19 years old that completely changed my life. The path I was headed towards made no sense, it was ignorant, unfulfilled. He taught me and introduced things to me that I will forever be grateful for. He would tell me things but at 19 I didnt grasp the value. I didnt have faith, I was not connected. I would feel the life of his words and the vibrance in the organic interest. The connection fizzled out because although there is light, there is darkness. Peace with both parties had yet to be made. In my mix of emotions I felt obligated to heal, I felt it deep within me. I wrote a poem and sat in my puddles of sadness. I recorded myself reciting this poem and sent it to my favorite twins. After that day Sept 19' I started to listen to positive sleep affirmations and practice yoga in my room. I read different books, I watched different videos, I absorbed so much information it was as if my body and my soul were like yeah this is it. I began to discover myself. In the mist of me discovering myself I was committing a great sin. I tricked myself to be in love with something that was a myth. I held tightly and poured all my love in to my paper with pen in hand. Physically tending to this sin as an action purely of the heart.
This sin was animated and left the paper and entered eyes and minds that forced the truth of ones reality. One thing about me if you ask me, I will tell you. Even living in deceite, I valued truth. As I experienced it's animation I experienced disgust in my actions. The love and lies I told my heart were completely washed.
I kept trying to attach myself to another being, I wanted to give someone all my love. I poured into myself but it wasnt enough I didnt comprehend my actions and quite frankly I still don't. Everyone in my life outside of my family left me, I was alone. I honestly was fine but I used up so much time typing on my phone why I was enough, expressing my value, the love in my heart. I entered another karmic cycle and it was what I thought I wanted, what I thought I needed. In that moment both statements were true. In some aspects he was the truth. The story repeats but this time I was aware of my darkness and was in the process of healing. This was the last relationship I had, any real interest hasn't bloomed since. I was forced into solitude. I was continuing my old habits but one night I sat on a coconut looking at the city of Miami and it was like something spoke to and woke me up. It shook me, it brought me slight pain and an abundance of peace. Know and make peace that some people may never be able to meet you on the same level you meet yourself.
Music has a grand influence in my life and I gravitated towards reggae music my whole life. My dad would listen to a lot of Bob Marley and I would sing all the songs unknowing to the power of each note. I learned about God through meditation, experiences, and music.
In my lowest moments, I seeked peace within. As I glimpsed this peace I overstood that the peace was much greater than me. I held that thought for months until I finally submitted to this energy force, God.
In the beginning I shared something I read that basically stated in order to experience bliss you must experience pain. In a sense it is true if you are far from God. These unfavorable experiences happen and one must take the good from it, learn the lesson.
PEACE AND LOVE ⚡